Where have all the cowboys gone?!

The words of my daughter rang through the house after she had broken with her fience. “They are all like scared, lost little boys. I need a man!”

Recently, I had a lady come to me asking about the Golden Arrow. She heard about us and loves that we make Catholic Knights. She is now starting a young women's group at our parish that will teach traditional femininity. The problem is that traditional femininity is not at all compatible with the modern male. Without guidance and formation for our young men, like my daughter, these beautiful young ladies, my have very few options.

While serving the church, I get a lot of great reactions. The clergy and layity both express a lot of thanks. I am often told how "wonderful" our mission is and how much it is appreciated. The bishop himself has expressed his support. Yet, very few want to be a part of it. But why?

Most men these days are not interested in being part of a mission beyond themselves. Most modern men are only considered “men” by mere age. Then there are those who do like the idea but may lack the motivation or confidence to step forward.

I don't know the exact reasons because none are ever expressed, but I can infer with the knowledge of what it takes to be a Catholic Knight.

Virtue!

Going back to the "why," men have to be molded for a mission that would be self-sacrificial. The love for Christ, our church, and our faith is not enough to motivate a modern man who has not been molded for a mission bigger than himself. As my daughter had learned, It takes virtue to make a man. In fact, the Latin word for man is virtus, and virtus is the root for virtue. You see, it is truly a great deal of virtue that makes a man. And it is ferocious virtue that makes a knight.

This is where the modern male so often falls short. But you can’t blame him. From a very young age, boys of Western culture are told their masculine tendencies are toxic. They are coddled and trained to be weak and lazy. And it is forgotten that being a man is so much more than just age and physical maturity. Being a man is the embodiment of a male of strong and virtuous character.

1. Taking Responsibility:

Real men understand responsibility and the importance of taking responsibility for their actions and decisions. This habit goes beyond simply admitting when they are wrong; it involves owning their responsibilities without the intercession of others and owning up to the consequences of their choice to ignore their responsibilities and work to make amends. They don't make excuses or blame others for their circumstances. Instead, they face challenges head-on and use their experiences as learning opportunities. By taking responsibility, they build credibility and trust with others, which is foundational for any meaningful relationship. This practice fosters maturity and accountability, setting the stage for personal and professional growth.

2. Developing Self-Discipline:

Self-discipline is a cornerstone habit that men cultivate in all areas of life. They set clear, achievable goals and establish effective routines to reach them. This involves prioritizing long-term benefits over short-term pleasures, such as maintaining a healthy lifestyle, managing finances wisely, or advancing in their careers. By mastering self-discipline, they develop the ability to stay focused and resilient in the face of distractions and setbacks. This habit empowers them to make consistent progress toward their aspirations, ultimately leading to a more fulfilled and purposeful life.

3. Seeking Continuous Growth:

Men are committed to personal growth and lifelong learning. They actively seek new knowledge, skills, and experiences, understanding that growth is a continuous process. They embrace challenges and step out of their comfort zones to push their boundaries. This habit includes reading, attending workshops, learning new hobbies, or seeking mentorship. By constantly pushing themselves to improve, they become more adaptable and innovative, capable of navigating an ever-changing world. This commitment to growth not only enhances their own lives but also positively impacts those around them.

4. Cultivating Emotional Intelligence:

Emotional intelligence is crucial for building strong, meaningful relationships. Men develop self-awareness, allowing them to understand their emotions and the impact they have on others. They regulate their emotions effectively, ensuring that their reactions are appropriate and constructive. By empathizing with others, they build deeper connections and navigate social complexities with ease. Effective communication and mature conflict resolution are key aspects of this habit, fostering an environment of mutual respect and understanding.

5. Showing Respect:

Real men treat others with respect, regardless of their background or status. They listen attentively, value different perspectives, and treat everyone with dignity. This habit is about recognizing the inherent worth of every individual and behaving in ways that reflect this understanding. Respect is earned through actions, not demanded, and men who consistently show respect build strong, supportive networks both personally and professionally.

6. Practicing Integrity:

Integrity involves upholding high moral and ethical standards. Men who practice integrity act with honesty, honor, and consistency in their personal and professional lives. They value trust and are true to their word, ensuring that their actions align with their values and principles. This habit builds a reputation of reliability and respect, fostering trust and admiration from others.

7. Embracing Leadership:

Leadership is not just about holding positions of power; it's about taking initiative and inspiring others. Men who embrace leadership make decisions confidently, take responsibility for their outcomes, and motivate those around them to achieve their full potential. They lead by example, demonstrating the behaviors and attitudes they wish to see in others. This habit involves empowering others, contributing positively to families, workplaces, and communities, and striving to create a better environment for all.

Incorporating these habits transforms boys into men by fostering maturity, responsibility, and the ability to influence their surroundings positively. But is this all? No. This is just the basics. The Catholic church says there are three marks of a man. He is also priest, prophet, and king to his family as he provides authority, self discipline, spiritual stewardship, and bears a cross of redemptive suffering for those he loves.

We will continue more on this. Then, we will address all that is beyond just a man, but a Christian knight.

In Nomine Domini!